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A Forum For Carers Forum Index -> Tell Me A Joke -> 10 Commandments of Marriage
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  Post 10 Commandments of Marriage - Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 3:57 pm Reply with quote  
Speeds
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Joined: 02 Sep 2007
Posts: 712
Location: Crowthorne, Berkshire

It made me smile

Commandment 1.

Marriages are made in heaven. But, so are thunders and lightnings.



Commandment 2.

If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you

say, talk in your sleep.



Commandment 3.

Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!



Commandment 4.

Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man

speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the

man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.



Commandment 5.

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one

thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.



Commandment 6.

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they

try to decide which one.



Commandment 7.

Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you

say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.



Commandment 8.

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a

good cook. But the law allows only one wife.



Commandment 9.

Marriage and love are purely matters of chemistry, that is why wife treats her

husband like toxic waste.



Commandment 10.

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.



Bonus Commandment story.

A long - married couple came upon a wishing well.

The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.

The husband decided to make a wish too.

But he leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The wife was

stunned for a moment but then smiled,

"Wow! This stuff really works!"

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  Post  - Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:27 pm Reply with quote  
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